Said and heard throughout the course of the Manifest Destiny Psychedelic Road Trip Summer 2008...
Lisa: It's no fun if I have to put pants on. (RE: Climbing a rock at the Arches camp ground while wearing bathing suit bottoms)
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Kyle: Of all the things you could've put in my mouth, that was in the top 5. (To Jina, after combining grapes with peanut butter and Ritz to make a PB&J)
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Kyle: I think this music is making me stupid. (RE: Country music playing at a Subway in Barstow)
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Lisa: I'm gonna write a comic about my colon. "Coley: The Detestable Digestable Friend."
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Lisa: (While swimming) I think I was a fish in a past life. Or maybe a dolphin, because I do like breathing air still.
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Kyle: His girlfriend looks like she would've been hot 10-15 years ago. (RE: Guy and girl in a convertible in LA, after speculating he could be a famous bassist in some band)
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Lisa: The garbage (in the car) has conformed to the shape of our bodies.
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Kyle (To Lisa and Jina): I don't think I've seen any girls play with their boobs as much as the two of you.
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Lisa: Wouldn't it be funny if there was a calculator with only one button? A random number-generating calculator? It'd be an existentialist calculator... "These answers don't make any sense. Can you clarify these answers? Can you clarify any answers?" - That's what I'd say...
Kyle: It'd be like an IPod Shuffle, but a calculator.
Jina: ..The TI-83 Shuffle!
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Jina: (Looking at a picture of "Funny Student" toys available in Kinder eggs) This one in the corner would be me..
Kyle: Why, cause it's a gook?
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Lisa: (Talking about Shannon Sossamon) Who planted their seed in that retard?
Kyle: I would be so excited if I planted my seed knowing it would come out named (Audio) Science..
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Kyle: We have a fuckin'.. Nebraska's worth of driving left.
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Jina: KFC!!!
Kyle: Why do all Asians love KFC?
Lisa: Allison, do you love KFC half as much as Jina?
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Jina: Why do I make and keep douchebags for friends?
Lisa: I was thinking that too. We both know douchebag Pauls. That sounds like a band.
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Kyle: You better go use the bathroom before me cause I'm gonna destroy it.
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Lisa: (After biting off the end of a carrot) I should join one of those cigar clubs and just break out a carrot instead.
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Kyle: (RE: Golden Retrievers in the back of a pickup truck) Look how good they are! They don't even jump out to their death.
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Jina: I'm all paranoid now. Stupid pot...
Lisa: What do you have to be paranoid about? We slept in a car on a beach in the dark last night. We could've been surrounded by 13 bears waiting to eat us, pounding their forks and knives...
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Lisa: Grasses! (Passing the optical store in the Asian market in Seattle Chinatown)
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Kyle: Why won't my phone let me type Buddha?
Lisa: Maybe it's a Christian phone.
Kyle: I think it is a Christian phone. It lets me type hell and damn and Jesus Christ, but not fuck or dick or cock or Buddha.
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Lisa: Jina, you always state your emotions instead of expressing them.
Kyle: What combination of pills do you have to take til you get to the point where you're just like, "angry." "Sad." "Hungry."
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(In Seattle)
Lisa: Kyle, we should go around taking pictures of homeless guys and fisherman and post them side by side and call it, "Fisherman or Hobo?"
Kyle: That sounds like something Letterman would do. Like "Will It Float?"
Lisa: It could still be "Will It Float?" only with hobos and fisherman. The hobos will sink because they have no reason to live.
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Lisa: (As we all laid on the air mattress to deflate it) This reminds me of my life.. deflated and weighed down by retards.
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Kyle: So we need to go to Kinko's, get some pizza, get tattoos, and drive back to Chicago. Okay let's go, we gotta be back in 15 hours.
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Jina: I'm all about simplicity. Simple - simple - simple. (Pointing to two tattoos and head)
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Lisa: (RE: Group of 20-something white people at Buddhist Chinese restaurant) You could tell they were nice people..Even though they were Buffys and Tylers.
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Lisa: (In gay Vancouver area) Ew, old-ass leather daddy. I bet he wears Depends under his chaps.
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Lisa: Vancouver is the Bermuda Triangle. Its nickname should be The Land of No Left Turns.
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Lisa: (Returning to the same gas station we stopped at en route to Vancouver) I should steal a new back for my pin. I'm gonna steal from this guy twice - once to steal shit and once to fix the shitty shit that I stole.
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1 comment:
Oh Captain Sparkle, you made the last ten minutes shine with glittery cupcakes as it breaks the monotony of printing stuff and sending out emails and rechecking emails over and over again as comps claim to have sent me something that I spent the last ten minutes telling them they haven't
WOMBATS!
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